A Safe Space
As I wrote about a few months ago, my wife Missy (who was one of the guests that were interviewed on The Little Things series…such a great job BTW, Panhandle PBS team!) and I sent our youngest child to college back in August, and as I write this, we are just four weeks into the empty nest phase of life! Season-of-life transitions are a meaningful and natural part of things. So much is happening all at the same time – one season is coming to an end, which usually brings both expressions of gratitude as well as a natural sense of loss; there is an in-between season of reflection, preparation and anticipation where things are not quite normal in this liminal space; and finally, there is the beginning of the new season and all its excitement, anticipation, challenges, and adjustments. I have had such a strong sense lately of the changes and transitions happening in my own life as well as around me lately. There are the familiar, annual transitions like the beginning of the semester; and I have also connected with many faculty and staff who are in seasons of transition, like beginning a new job at AC, having a baby, retiring, or even grieving and adjusting to a new normal when you lose a loved one.
I wanted to share a couple of thoughts that relate to life transitions. First, welcome the process. We tend to be antsy to get on with it and get into the new thing that we can miss the invitation that comes during seasons of transition. Changes in life can wake us up from our hypnotic week-to-week routine, and there is an opportunity to be more awake and open in this liminal space. We gain more perspective and maybe see life more clearly (think shutdown during COVID). How might you engage this next season differently based on your reflection that this in-between transition afforded you? So, don’t rush it. Be open and attentive.
Secondly, what might be the common anchor points we can carry with us from phase to phase? How can we ensure that we will stay healthy and happy through every phase of our lives? Some of us will probably struggle to find lasting happiness; others seem to only get happier as time passes. Researcher and author Arthur Brooks shares about a clear fork in the road that we will all face at some point. He says that the trick is knowing what to do to get on – and stay on – the happy path. He mentions four keys to happiness that translate to all phases of life. He suggests we keep our focus on:
- Our faith or life philosophy. Life is more integrated and fulfilling when our outward expressions come from and are aligned with the internal clarity of knowing what we want our lives to be about, and why.
- Your family life. Giving your loved ones the best version of you and your time and attention is hard, especially when we’ve worked all day and it’s easy for our family to get our scraps. The healthiest and best workers are the ones whose family comes first, and both your family and your work know that.
- Investing in friendships. You only get out of relationships what you put into them, and in our world of isolation and loneliness, make time to do the good, emotional work of investing in those you care about and that care about you.
- Work that is meaningful. There is a sense of connection and fulfillment in your work when you tend to feel you are both earning your success as well as serving other people. (I thought of our AC community when I read this and the meaningful mission and impact that you bring about through what you do!)
Here’s to healthy transitions and a meaningful, happy semester!
Adam Gray
806.282.5263
scheduling link - https://InnerWellServices.as.me/AmarilloCollege
